If it’s ok with you guys, I’d like to be real for a moment.
I generally consider myself to be an optimist – my attitude is typically positive, I look on the “bright side,” my glass is half full, yada da yadda. But lately, specifically in the past three weeks, I’ve found myself having more than the occasional pessimistic thought. It’s like my own personal dark cloud has been hovering around, wracking my anxiety and making me a Debbie Downer. Or rather, a Loser Laura.
I’ve fallen out of some healthy habits, and as a result have found myself SICK. I’ve been fighting a virus for over a week, the main lovely symptom of which is a sore throat and gross, heavy cough. Because of this I’ve missed not one but two races, and tonight am missing out on two parties. As a social creature, this greatly disappoints me. Not to mention how frustrating it is not to be able to RUN!
Putting things into perspective… I really need to STFU. All of my negativity and “problems” are so insignificant from a global perspective. Poor Laura, she has full time employment with full benefits and her work is stressing her out. Poor Laura, she has a minor virus and feels sick, for which she has already seen a primary care physician and is treating with readily accessible, inexpensive OTC medications to ease the symptoms. Poor Laura, she didn’t get to run her races which cost money that could feed a family in a developing country for a month. Poor Laura, she’s had to drink lots of clean, safe water which comes from the cooler at work or faucet at home. Poor Laura, she has to stay in and rest this weekend, in the comfortable and warm home that she shares with a loving partner and animals that they rescued from the Humane Society.
See what I mean? All of this negativity has brought me to a point where I have to laugh at myself, and just STOP it already. This afternoon, I was sitting in my favorite chair in the living room, looking out our high windows at the trees outside, whose branches are filled with the most gorgeous yellow leaves that were blowing in the wind. The moment brought me peace, and made me realize how foolish I’ve been. Though I may currently be sidelined, I am grateful.
Onward and upward, right?